Sunday, 25 January 2015

Greece it up

So Greece has elected a socialist government. Oh lordy. That’ll put the cat among the pigeons.

The news tomorrow will no doubt consist of a bunch of rich white guys in ties talking about how a lack of confidence has caused the stock market to crash, because other rich guys in ties are panicking about the Greek election result. The value of the Euro will fall, a company will go out of business, and a bunch of ordinary people will lose their jobs.

It sounds to me as if we need tougher people to work in the stock markets. If the slack jawed hooray Henries that currently run our financial institutions are liable to turn into quivering jellies and shit themselves just because they saw something on the news they didn’t like the sound of, then frankly they aren’t up to the job. Maybe we should get someone who knows no fear on the case; someone like Rambo; someone who doesn’t suffer from lack of confidence and would be perfectly happy to kick everybody’s ass. He’d protect our money.

All jokes aside, I think people ought to do as I do when they watch the news, and filter every word they hear through a Bullshit Translator to see what comes out the other end. The phrase ‘lack of confidence in the market’, when translated into English, simply means ‘a bunch of rich powerful people aren’t happy’. Of course they aren’t happy; ordinary people in Greece have decided to stick up for themselves; they’ve decided they don’t like poverty and would like it if the system was a bit fairer. And rich people don’t like it when ordinary people stick up for themselves. It means they might not be able to steal our money quite so easily. That’s why they smashed the unions and left our education system to rot; they were taking out the competition, reducing us all to drooling morons so we wouldn’t put up a fight.

The whole economic system is geared towards siphoning cash from the lower orders and placing it in the pocket of the super-rich. This isn’t some whacked out conspiracy theory; it’s the obvious truth and if you don’t see it then you’re blind. I foresee a future where there is no more need for countries or continents. Instead of a flag to represent their nationality, people will live under the logo of a corporate brand. The land you walk upon will be owned by a multinational conglomerate, and you will be entirely beholden to them. They will own the hospital you are born in, the school you are educated in, the chapel you marry in, and the coffin you are buried in. The lives of 99.99% of the human race will be controlled by the 0.01% who managed to steal all the money.

Of course, there is something we can do to stop them before it’s too late; something that will not require rioting in the street or bloody revolution. We can go out and vote, like Greece did yesterday. This is still a democracy after all - even if for seventy percent of the country the act of voting is, like, just too much hassle.

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